The FUELher Podcast - Breaking Generational Curses, Kingdom Resources, Coaching Christian Women to Hustle & Grow the God Way

EP 7 // Living with Fear & Shame: 4 Things to Embrace Them

WORKSHEET (PDF) ATTACHED TO EPISODE

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays friends!! I am so grateful that you are here & I pray that you get some FUEL for your day! If you love today's episode, share with someone you know needs to hear it & leave a review for me! I love to hear what you guys feel and think. 

Sister friend, are you in a place in life right now where you are feeling stuck? Maybe it’s between a rock and a hard place, maybe it’s just stuck between the past and the future, maybe it’s stuck in a toxic relationship, in a toxic work environment & you just don;t know how to get unstuck. Or if you’re even worth getting unstuck. 

The truth I want you to know today is that you are not broken home girl, a pattern that you have is. That’s it. The good news? YOU CAN FIX IT. Let me tell you about where I am at right now, and a little bit about the path that got me here & the realization i had this week that I think could really help you if you are feeling….well scared and stuck and fed up with feeling like that.

Fear is a good thing.
Failure is not the enemy. Living a life in autopilot, in mediocrity is the enemy. Failure, just like fear, is meant to teach you something.

Fear is an emotion, although unpleasant, it can warn you about danger that could be getting ready to happen or is happening around you. 

But what if the thing you are fearing is not real? What if that fear, that emotion, is actually being triggered by something, a story, you have created yourself?

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Worksheet so you can journal out the questions on your time
Fear Is My Homeboy by Judi Holler 
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
Work It Out by Mel Robbins 

So home girrrl, let’s do the hard work to FUEL our faith over our fear, so you can free your soul. And if you need someone to help you shine the light on your own fears, hit me on Instagram or in my email friend.

January is right around the corner, in the Fit Club we are doing a little countdown to 2021 by reflecting on this year with grateful hearts & through the eyes of hope. 

Here’s my reflection:

In 2020, 
I lost a lot of people from family members and friends to network connections I enjoyed having. 
From that though, I gained deeper relationships with family and friends that are still around. 

My husband and I are learning how to set boundaries for our marriage and for the family that we created, not all of our immediate family. Our intimacy has reached a new level. 

2020 was the year I learned my triggers and learned my biggest fears. 
That was heavy and hard, but that means I gained priceless wisdom. 

In 2020, I have learned to trust God no matter what. I have given more control over to Him this year than ever before. 

I figured out that activism for oppressed people in our country is a big passion of mine, and likely will be apart of my voice going forward no matter what w o r k I am doing otherwise. 

I am not broken. 
The way I was speaking to myself was. 
I have/had patterns of self sabotaging that were broken. 
I learned in 2020 that they aren’t me. 

Right now on December 28th 2020, I am finding myself wanting to drink significantly less. I am ready to call myself out for self-sabotaging behaviors, put a serious plan together to serve as many women as I can from fear, shame, trauma, and mediocrity with this podcast, with the fit club, with any devotionals/books/groups/group coaching/physical resources/community service projects that I can come up with & bring to life.

This year I found the real, authentic me under my shame, under my fear, under my trauma for the first time since 2009, and it’s been hard and messy, but today as I am typing this out.

I am proud.
I am excited.
And I know the best has yet to come.

What did you learn or gain this year? What are you proud of? 

Remember friend, growing can feel a lot like breaking at first. So if this year was a planting year for you too, you are not alone. Our blooming season is coming. <3 

EP 6 // Is the Morning Routine Necessary??

TELL ME DOES THIS SOUND LIKE YOU: wake up, hit the snooze button a dozen times, check your phone for notifications, social medias, email maybe...coffee is probably the first thing that you put in your body for the day, and maybe just maybe you eat if you find something you can grab before, well what use to be...rushing out the door for work, but what now is now logging into your Zoom or Google meeting.

AND Here is the hard question I want you to ask yourself: What does it feel like to be you emotionally when you wake up? 

If you find value in today's episode, please take a minute and drop me a review on iTunes. I truly appreciate each of you. Hearing from my community lights my soul on fire! 

Episode notes:

I hated the morning because I hated facing another day. I loved my baby and I truly loved my husband even though we were struggling so bad at the time. It was honestly because of God alone that I still had the tiniest sliver of hope in my heart that things could change. 

If you don't get a hold of your 
mornings, you've lose the entire day. 

HERE'S THE THING : A MORNING ROUTINE IS NOT ABOUT WHEN YOU WAKE UP. IT'S HOW YOU WAKE UP.

You are going to find a s i m p l e morning routine that you can do EVERYDAY with consistency no matter how busy your life is that will bring the best you forward day in and day out. All that this morning routine takes is ten minutes!! And the only thing that matters with this ten minute strategy is consistency. 

"When I get all those things done, I feel invincible, but the change and secret is in the consistency of cultivating those new patterns. IT'S HARD TO NOT CHECK THE PHONE FIRST THING! Sometimes I get anxiety, but THAT'S NORMAL. I'M HUMAN WITH A TENDACY. WITH A PATTERN.

So sis, I want you to think about what your morning routine or lack therefore of is costing you? Is it costing you time? Productivity? Relationships? Work life? Your Joy? 

YOU ARE WORTH MORE. YOU HAVE A PURPOSE HERE MORE THAN CHECKING ALL THE BOXES and posting about them on social media.

TAKE A LISTEN AND TAKE YOUR CONTROL BACK TODAY SISTER

If you felt any connection to today's episode, please take a minute & leave a review on iTunes. Better yet, take a screenshot share it on your Instagram story & tag me!! So I can personally shout you out and thank you!!

Our December 21 DAYS OF GIVEAWAYS Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN! Get workouts, daily prizes, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability coach. I am only taking 3 NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays JUMP ON GRABBING THE DETAILS FRIEND!

You can shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag one of the new client spots or what it is all about!! Enrollment is open UNTIL December 9th! 

Learn More About the FitClub (details and pricing only) 

LETS GET FUELED SIS <3 

EP 5 // The Power of Dialogue with Sierra Clark

I am so grateful that you are here! I pray that you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you wherever you are today! 
In this episode: Sierra Clark is a child of God, daughter, sister, friend, girl friend, step mother, God mommy, and medical student. Born and raised in Indianapolis. She attended undergrad in Hampton, Virginia and graduated from Hampton University. She returned to Indianapolis for 3 years where she worked and prepared for medical school and met Ashley while working full time in medical billing!!! Then moved to Ohio for medical school. She is currently is in her final year of medical school and graduates in May 2021 to start pursuing her long, lived dream of being an OBGYN. 

Today, Miss, almost Dr., Sierra Clark and I talk about her journey into medical school here in the US as a black woman in 2020. Not without first talking about how as a 17-18 year old with complete plans to become a doctor, she faced choosing between her family and her future because her hard working single mom lost the job that she had for years, and there was a baby brother in the picture. Would she stay home to help hold the family down or pursue her dreams to become a doctor? Sierra has no doubt overcome and persisted through some serious obstacles, but she is full of grace. I love that I get to call her a friend. A friend that I have ached for this in this year of 2020 in America as race becomes an issue that not only needs to be talked about, but needs to be talked about with people that are not the same race as you. There is power in dialogue. Listen to two unlikely friends "the angry black woman" and the "a 'Karen' to anti-racist" We are a lot more alike than we are different. Our mission here is to simply start a conversation, and we don't leave Jesus out of it either. 

 

I can't wait to hear how this conversation makes you feel! HER GO TO SCRIPTURE: Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take."

FIND SIERRA: SI'S INSTAGRAM 
She and I both have highlights at the top of our feed with more information how you can get more involved or find some resources where you can LEARN. It all starts with learning! 

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN EPISODE: 
Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man
Just Mercy
Just Mercy (iTunes)
White Fragility on Audible
Scripture read was Luke 13:1-5 NLT "About this time Jesus was informed that Pilate had murdered some people from Galilee as they were offering sacrifices at the Temple. 2 “Do you think those Galileans were worse sinners than all the other people from Galilee?” Jesus asked. “Is that why they suffered? 3 Not at all! And you will perish, too, unless you repent of your sins and turn to God. 4 And what about the eighteen people who died when the tower in Siloam fell on them? Were they the worst sinners in Jerusalem? 5 No, and I tell you again that unless you repent, you will perish, too.”

WAIT, there's MORE: Sierra and I are taking this conversation one step farther and going virtual! Mid December we are getting together with woman of A L L races and having another conversation. Why? Because we are better together, and there is something that we can all do here and now! Stay tuned for WHEN the Zoom time will be! 

Before you go friend! Just so you know: December is secretly the B E S T time to figure out what my virtual Fit Club is all about. Why? Because every December we do a 21 days of Giveaways group! Who doesn't need a present for working out in December??!
Get workouts, nutrition help (NOT restrictions), new weekly meal ideas, a virtual community that loves hard, and an accountability coach that cares if you check in. 

You can DM me on Instagram for more information or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag your spot!! LIMITED (5) SPOTS - we want to make sure everyone is getting something special! 

And for ALL the HEAT!!
-Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on Spotify

EP4 // // 2020 SHUT DOWN *AGAIN* FEELS

I am so grateful that you are here! I hope you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you! 

MONDAY we announced our $100 Visa gift card WINNER ~ CONGRATS ELLI <3 

 

5 QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF ABOUT 2020: 

NUMBER ONE : WHAT WILL SERVE US RIGHT NOW IS CHOOSING TO FOCUS ON THE GOOD. What has focusing on the sad, bad, mad, etc done for us so far in 2020??

NUMBER TWO : HOW CAN YOU PRACTICE DAILY GRATITUDE HERE AND NOW SIS?! 

NUMBER THREE : Have you learned something about yourself during this time (year) that you either didn't know before or were able to cover up really well? Good or bad. 

NUMBER FOUR : If you can't change the people around BUTTT you can change the people around you 
"What boundaries have you found out this year that you SHOULD be enforcing?"

NUMBER FIVE : WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT GIRL??????????
 ARE YOU GOING TO JUST KNOW THIS AND GO ON ABOUT YOUR DAY IN 2021?! I HOPE NOT!!!
 GLENNON DOYLE SAYS "

CALLLLLLLLLLLL TO ACTION : 

I CHALLENGE YOU TO SEND ME THE ANSWERS TO YOUR QUESTIONS TO MY EMAIL OR MY DMS ON Instagram-- LETS HOLD EACH OTHER ACCOUNTABLE FOR AN ABUNDANT AND VIBRANT 2021

 

HEY FRIEND! Just so you know: November Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN! Get workouts, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability coach. I am only taking 5 NEW // ONLY THREE ARE //  NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays
JUMP ON IT SISTER! Fill this quick form out to get ALL THE DETAILS! 

You can also DM me on Instagram or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag 
one of the new client spots or what it is all about!! 

And for ALL the HEAT!!
WANT A DAILY SCRIPTURE EMAILED TO YOU? Subscribe to our email list! 

DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE A PLAYLIST?? Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on Spotify

EP 3: When You Need to Be Loved Better

WHATS UP FRIEND?! I am so grateful that you are here! I hope you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you!

**GIVEAWAY ALERT** e x t e n d e d bc you babes are awesome!!
If you leave a review on iTunes by SUNDAY night (11/15/2020), your name will go to a drawing for a $100 Visa giftcard. 
If you take a screen shot and tag me on your stories, you will get a second entry into the drawing!! 
LET'S GET FUELed GIRL! 

This road trip I am talking to my friend that is looking to everyone
else in her world for the love she should be giving to herself.

Dr. Wayne Dyer says, "If you don’t love yourself, nobody will. 
Not only that, you won’t be good at loving anyone else. Loving starts 
with the self." 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Disney+!! 
We LOVE Disney plus in this household (hello 4 year old little girl and 2 year little boy!) But don't you just hate the "Happily Ever After" garbage they sold us on?! Like we were always the "Damsels in distress" in our lives and we just simply need someone else to do the saving for us. 

HERE ARE A COUPLE THINGS I DID THAT HELPED ME ~ 
1. Write yourself love letters
2. WORK ON YOUR SELF TALK DAILY 
3. EAT LIKE YOU LOVE YOURSELF. MOVE YOUR BODY LIKE YOU LOVE YOURSELF.
SPEAK LIKE YOU LOVE YOURSELF. ACT LIKE YOU LOVE YOURSELF. 
4. GET IN & READ THAT BIBLE GIRL!

Sometimes God does let us hit rock bottom, so we have no choice but to turn to Him. He showed me that I was allowed to be a masterpiece AND a work in progress at the same time. And SO ARE YOU!!

If you haven't noticed before, I have a FUELher FAITH playlist linked to every episode & you guys can go listen to what I listen to when I need FUELED. If 
you are a music person, three songs on that playlist I want you to go listen to are:

1. Who Am I by NEEDTOBREATHE and Elle King
2. I Am Who You Say I Am by Hillsong United
3. The Father's House by Corey Asbury

If this hit home for you - I WANT TO HELP HOLD YOU ACCOUNTABLE 
Go find me on Instagram @ashleyanallen and tell me what GAME PLAN OF LOVE YOU ARE MAKING.

Are you going to write yourself love letters?
Do you need to put in some work on how you speak to yourself? 
Did you set some affirmation alarms up?! 
Want or need a bible reading buddy??

I AM HERE FRIEND ~ ALWAYS A MESSAGE AWAY. 

GIRL, NO MORE LOOKING AROUND THE ROOM FOR THE LOVE YOU SHOULD BE GIVING TO YOURSELF!! 

HEY FRIEND! Just so you know: November Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN! Get workouts, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability
coach. I am only taking 5 NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays
JUMP ON IT SISTER! Fill this quick form out to get ALL THE DETAILS! 

You can also DM me on Instagram or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag 
one of the new client spots or what it is all about!! 

And for ALL the HEAT!!
-To E-mail me: ashieannefit4@gmail.com
-Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on Spotify

EP 2: 5 Questions We Do NOT Leave Up To Our OWN Understanding

I am so grateful that you are here! I hope you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you!

**GIVEAWAY UPDATE ALERT** 
If you left a review on iTunes last week, YOU MADE ME CRY FOR SURE. The drawing for the $100 Visa gift card happened TODAY! CHECK OUT the LIVE to see who snagged it! 

"Have you ever decided you were going to start something right here and now ya know start doing something different something down the right and exciting path?!"

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN BAMM -- ALL THE BAD THINGS START HAPPENING?! 

"And when it rains, it pours am I right?!"

"Yes WELL what if I am here to tell you that that is on purpose. 

Bc there is a very real thing fighting against you
~SATAN~ 

BUT 
!!! BUT !!! 

Here is WHY you can stop saying "YEAH SO WHY TRY AGAIN!"

"BECAUSE HE HAS NOT CALLED YOU TO UNDERSTAND. HE HAS CALLED YOU TO OBEY."

"THE NUMBER ONE REASON why we don't take action towards those little desires we have
for our lives ~ BECAUSE you don't know how it's going to play out!!!"

QUESTIONS THAT I WANT YOU TO SPEED RIGHT THROUGH THAT I STUGGLED WITH ~

1. what if I fail
2. what if I let people down 
3. what all would I have to change to get to my desired end result
4. how much time is between where you are today and where you really want to be/think you should be 
5. what if I actually succeed?!

"HERE IS THE ONE THING THAT I DO KNOW!!"

Read and meditate on Proverbs 3:5-7 

I want you to stop for a second today to ask God to give you COMFORT 
in the TRUTH that you do not have to do this on your own & that your life DOES have soooo more meaning than what you, personally, have been giving it. Friend, just ask him to show you the good works that He has planned specifically for you!

LET'S GET FUELED TODAY SISTER!

HEY FRIEND! Just so you know: November Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN until the 12th!! Get workouts, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability
coach. I am only taking 5 NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays
JUMP ON IT SISTER! Fill this form out to get ALL THE DETAILS! 

You can also DM me on Instagram or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag 
one of the new client spots or what it is all about!! 

And for ALL the HEAT!!
-Join my email list: Click here to Subscribe now
-Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on Spotify

EP. 1X Who am I? 4 Things You Can Do to Break Free from that Pesky Question

**GIVEAWAY ALERT** 
-If you leave a review on iTunes by SUNDAY night (11/8/2020), your name will go to a drawing for a $100 Visa giftcard. 
-If you take a screen shot and tag me on your stories, you will get a second entry into the drawing!! 
LET'S GET FUELed GIRL! 

I am so grateful that you are here! I hope you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you! 

Have you ever asked yourself "who the heck am I to really be in love with my life?" I'm just *fill in the blank* so who am I to *fill in the blank*? 

"Before Jesus I was ratchet. With Jesus? I know literally anything is possible."
"I've made a lot of mistakes that make me want to hide from people."
"I realized the more time I spend regretting my past, the more I am 
wasting my future."
"Why do you think Satan tries so hard to make us feel so insecure? So we will keep our mouth shut and continue on like 
nothing needs to change."

"Fresh Start." 31 January 2014. Gill, Keith. 5 November 2020. In Christ Archives - Page 3 of 3

"The Secret to Unlocking Empowered Healing" I like to call it." 
"YOU ARE God's masterpiece" Ephesians 2:10 NIV
"You are fearfully and wonderfully made bc God himself knit you together in your mother's womb" Psalm 139:13
"He created you in His image" Genesis 1:27
"Write the top three lies that you believe about yourself down on a piece of paper" 

AUDIBLE - THEY HAVE A DEAL GOING ON Only $4.95/MONTH FOR FIRST SIX MONTHS!! (this does not monetarily benefit me).
PODCASTS: other than mine, here are my top 3!!

1. EmpowerHER by Kacia Fitzgerald

2. The Hustle Sanely Podcast by Jess Massey

3. Straight Up with Trent Shelton 

"Number 1 : know you are amazing & God thinks so too. LIKE REALLY flipping amazing
Number 2 : don't bury yourself in excuses for holding on to those lies as truths. 
Number 3 : find your people that match your future, not your past 
and
Number 4 : Get out of your routine & make a commitment to personal growth with a few people that are a couple steps 
ahead of you and tap into them through books or podcasts"

HEY FRIEND! Just so you know: November Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN! Get workouts, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability coach. I am only taking 5 NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays...JUMP ON IT SISTER! Fill out this quick FORM to get all the details sent to you! 

You can also DM me on INSTAGRAM or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag 
one of the new client spots!! 

And last but not least ~ for ALL the HEAT!!
-Join my email list: Click HERE
-Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on SPOTIFY

Running on E: TEASER episode for the FUELher Podcast

In this quick teaser episode I'll share why this podcast has been created, who it is for, and the heart and soul behind the show. Take a minute to get to know a little bit about Ashley & why she is fired up to serve the everyday woman who has God size dreams in heart who thinks that she is frozen by insecurities, fears, doubt, and external circumstances. 

"I don't know what your feels are about today's "fake it until you make it" mantra"
"As the notorious hot mess mom of my friend group, I know I can't be the only one who feels the constant pressure from the social media highlight reels." 
"I still remember sitting in that room with 5 or so old white men...telling me I wasn't worth their time or money anymore."
"Even still to this day I am really not sure which memory is more painful: the actual sexual assault or the feeling like everything I worked my entire life for was being stripped away."
"This podcast is for the person, that yes knows what it feels like to suffer, but you know what she refuses to be the woman who buries her potential under her excuses." 
"..so she won't only believe in that worth, but she's going to ACT ON IT."
"We all miss out when you keep your story hidden in the dark." 

My story is nothing special. I am a 29 year old, later in life Christian, wife, mom and Corporate America slave turned stay at home mom turned health and wellness coach who fell in love with the personal development part of her work. I've spent  the majority of my twenties figuring out how to turn shame, guilt & self - hatred into self awareness, acceptance & love. God has shown me that sharing our mess could mean eternity for someone else. We are all connected. My story isn't special, 
but it led me here. And it led you here, too!! That LIGHTS ME UP!

If you felt any connection to today's episode, please take a minute & leave a review on iTunes. Better yet, take a screenshot share it on your Instagram story & tag me!! So I can personally shout you out and thank you. I am so grateful that you are here! I hope you feel God's presence here & feel Him moving in you! 

November Fit Club Enrollment is OPEN! Get workouts, nutrition help, weekly meal ideas, a virtual community, and an accountability coach. I am only taking 5 NEW health and wellness coaching clients this month, so if you need help through the holidays JUMP ON IT SISTER! Want more details about the November Fit Club?

You can also DM me on Instagram or shoot me an email at ashieannefit4@gmail.com if you have any questions about how to snag one of the new client spots or what it is all about!! 

And for ALL of the HEAT!!
-Follow our FUELher FAITH playlist on Spotify
-Find me over on Facebook HERE <3